This Is Not A Joke

This snapshot of my world actually started the night before when I told the kidlets that Johnny had a doc appointment the next morning.

Johnny: "For WHAT??? Am I getting a SHOT???"

The Chorus:  "WE HAVE TO GO TO THE DOCTOR??  DO I NEED A SHOT? IS HE SICK? IS THIS LIKE WHEN WE HAD SHOTS (flu) LAST YEAR??"

I explained that it was just a checkup with his allergist.  No big deal.

Johnny: "OKAY.  So NO shot.  Right?  Just Dr. S?"

The Chorus: "Wait! He IS getting a shot? Why is he getting a shot?  He didn't last time!!!"  Etc for another 30 seconds or so.

I turned around and finished prepping dinner.


We were driving in the car the next morning - on our way to said appointent - when this conversation happened, all in about 2 1/2 exhausting minutes.  Keep in mind, we had been in the car for 5 blocks.

Everyone: "WHY ARE WE DRIVING IN THIS DIRECTION? WHERE ARE WE GOING? THIS ISN'T THE WAY TO THE GROCERY STORE!!" (I had not mentioned a syllable about the grocery store)

Me: "Remember?  Johnny has an appointment this morning with Dr. S"

Johnny: "It isn't a Drs. Appointment.  It's a check-up.  You don't get shots at check-ups."

Me: "Johnny.  I called the Doctor to make an appointment to see the Doctor.  It's the same thing."

Oldest Child: "So where are we going?"

Me: "To Dr. S. Johnny has a check up."

Oldest: "So no shot, right?  Ok."

20 seconds later:

Female Triplet: "Hey! Where are we going now?"

Me: "Still driving to Johnny's check up."

Same Triplet: "Why?"

I didn't answer.

10 seconds later:

Fourth-Born Child:  "Why are we driving this way?"

Me: "Because this is the way to the doctor's office."

Same Child: "Why is this the way?"

Me: "Because this is the way we go."

Same maddening, yet delightful child: "Why?"

Me: "It just IS!  This is the direction in which we need to drive in order to get to Dr. S's office, so we are taking this road."

Same child: "Ok. But this isn't the way to the grocery store.  Are we going to the grocery store?"

Silence.  I could not physically respond because my brain was starting to shut down.

10 seconds later:

The smallest of the bairn: "Why is Johnny getting a shot?"

Johnny: "WAIT! Did she say I was getting a shot???  You said I wasn't getting a SHOT!!"

No lie.  Only there was more of it.  I can't remember it all because it's 12:30 in the morning and I'm just too tired.

Part of me sort of hoped they would all get shots, just because I had promised they wouldn't and it would have been sort of fun to see the nurses and Dr. run for the hills when 5 kids flipped out on them in unison. Delightful.