Thursday, January 14, 2010

Mean, Mean Mommy

Whenever I need to guarantee the Big Three stay out of my room, I put this Bad Boy in the middle of the floor:

Obviously we try to keep the door shut, but is that always going to happen?

Why do I do this? All four of my kids despise the vacuum cleaner. Ainsley barely tolerates it now and still makes sure she leaves the area; when she was little I'd find her in her bed, desperately sucking on her paci to keep her blood pressure down. But the Three, they go grade-A ballistic. If I even mention that I need to vacuum they start to cry. Lawd help us all when I actually roll the thing out of the closet...which is what happened today.

It had been an embarrassingly long time since the floor of my bedroom had been cleaned and I perceived it was a "safe" time. The kids were downstairs, happily playing, just had a snack, happy, happy, happy. "I'll just get this done speedy-quick. They'll hear it, but will be downstairs. I'll shut the door." Silly, silly Mommy.

Gracie followed me upstairs, then Lizzy. Gracie heard me tell my friend, Joan (I was on the phone), that I was getting ready to vacuum and started crying. Me: "Gracie, go get your lovies sweetie! (I rarely tell her she's allowed to get those nasty things out of her crib). " She retrieved them and then pronated herself in the middle of my bedroom floor, sobbing. Lizzy had already run away, screaming. I was pulling the vacuum out of the closet when Johnny strolled in, oblivious, carrying a princess tea party bowl, full of cereal and a spoon (why??). He took one look, literally threw the bowl and spoon in the air, turned tail and ran away. The look of terror on his face made me feel a little sorry for him, but GUYS!

They all left and I shut the door, fortunately spared from the freak-out-fest that then took place. Finally finished, I came downstairs to see all four kiddos on the couch watching Curious George (a fan favorite around here). You see, John works from home and had to come up from the basement to stop the madness. Three little faces red from crying. Big sigh from me.

We should start saving now for the counseling they're going to need because their mother didn't want them to live in filth.


susie said...

I will testify to the accurate description here........They all HATE the vacuum and freak here if they see it out........Good luck with future endeavors on house keeping!

Kim said...
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